Everyone is saying that it's the last Friday of 2012, how are you celebrating yours? The thing is there's gonna be another last saturday, sunday, monday of 2012... How are you gonna celebrate them all? Maybe it just so happens that they fall on the weekend. Weee for all the people that gets to celebrate. And I'm just stuck at home doing nothing and writing this instead.
Let's look back at how I got through 2012. I remembered that I asked for a smooth ride throughout and the ride was pretty smooth till now but i can't deny that there were a few big potholes and hills that got in the way. I learned so much this year and have so many "first times" of my life. Downside is of course i got worse results. It was going down the roller coaster ride.
I've got to see so many of my friends that get to leave Malaysia for studies and some even got to travel to places such as Hong Kong, Thailand, Singapore, Taiwan, USA, Australia, China and etc. I must admit though, I haven been to even KL much, dun even try to mention outstation trips. Really hoped that one day I can get to travel when I want to and see great places and have fun like all normal people can and not get stuck because of financial constraints. Missed so many trips and rejected so many outing offers enough for others to get frustrated to try and ask anymore.
I was wishing things can turn around much as in environment wise but I think I should look into myself too. When I kind of think back, onli if others enjoy your presence would someone take the extra effort to try and convince you to come right. Not because they sympathize you for not having any company. I should really work on my PR skills real bad. How to actually make people to like me for who I am and not mold me into this person that people would like? This is really killing my brain cells.
Whenever I see rich brats buy stuffs like money was just printed paper I would get so upset, maybe not just upset but angry. Just because you can does not mean you have to. Think of all the people who does not have the privilege. Well, I can only say, enjoy while you can. What goes around comes around. Not being evil-minded though.
Got so off topic. I was also wishing to reconnect with people who was once in my life but then i guessed everyone moved on. You see them posting pictures and posts and what? you comment and that ends there. I see them face to face, and I can only stand and can't say a word. Tell them what? I was kind of regretting today that I told them about me, my personal stuffs. Not expecting any kind of sympathy and I just, maybe its just me, always get the sympathy look. So, if I was doing well today, would they be happy for me. Would they be happy that i was not that person once so desperate and suicidal? I really have no idea what they would think.
People say, the longer you stay with a person, the more you know about them. And the fact is, they are not the people who I once knew, maybe physically the same but urghhh, i dont know how to describe. Maybe I'm just anti-social or something.
I was given the book Unstoppable: The Power of Faith in Action by Nick Vujicic. Supposed to be motivational, undeniable fact i supposed. He's already in that condition and the things he can do. Maybe I should just try and be more positive about the world and try to ignore what people might think of me and just do the right thing. What goes around, comes around right? Karma I believe is what helps balances the world. Signing off for now. XOXO.
